BERBA HAS A DREAM
So, you'll probably have spotted by now the words from Dimitar Berbatov, saying he wants a 'dream' move to Manchester United.
Really? You haven't? Then clicketh here old friend.
ROBINHO STAYING AT REAL
Quick word now from our European cousins, and the ever reliable Marca this morn.
They carry quotes from a Mr Ramon Calderon (we know, extraordinary that he's spouting forth), on the future of Robinho, still reportedly subject to significant interest from Chelsea. Although going on their performance on Sunday, they might as well not bother.
"Robinho seguirá aquí con seguridad absoluta" said Calderon, which roughly translates as "He ain't going nowhere chief."
And as we all know, Calderon is a man whose word can be trusted absolutely...
COOL FOR CATS
Word in the papers this morning is that Sunderland are heaving out the chequebook after their opening day defeat to Fernando Torres.
The Daily Mail claims Royston Keane will make another bid for Blackburn striker Benni McCarthy, this time slightly closer to the £9million old United mucka Paul Ince is asking for the South African.
Don't fear though Rovers fans - The Sun reports Robbie Fowler will sign a permanent deal at Ewood Park. You're saved.
Anyway, back to Sunderland. Depending on which journal you take, Niall Quinn and his disco pants will either be sending either £6million (The Daily Mirror) or £8million (The Independent) down to West Ham. What both papers agree on is that it will be in return for Anton Ferdinand, causing guffaws all round in the Upton Park boardroom, one would imagine.
SAME OLD, SAME OLD
Looks like Everton might finally be putting their collective hand in their collective pocket.
No new names for you Toffees fans alas, with The Daily Mail reporting that the club have sent a delegation over to Portugal to finally thrash out a deal for Joao Moutinho with Sporting Lisbon.
They also reckon a loan deal for Tiago is a whisker away from being agreed with Juventus, and that David Moyes 'has not yet given up' on Alan Smith.
Which is nice, because the rest of us have.
BAGGIES TO START SPENDING
Assorted rags report this morn that West Brom have decided that it might be a good idea to buy some players after all, and are thus dusting off the chequebook.
The targets of their dough are apparently Real Mallorca midfielder Borja Valero, who'll cost £5million, and Charlton's striker/midfielder Zheng Zhi.
So there you go.
AND THE REST...
Portsmouth boss Harry Redknapp is targeting 32-year-old Argentinian Juan Pablo Sorin who has been released by Hamburg...Arsenal left-back Kieron Gibbs, 18, is ready to sign a one-year loan deal with Reading...Ex-Watford striker Gifton Noel-Williams, 28, is set for a lucrative move to Neftchi Baku in Azerbaijan...Stoke boss Tony Pulis is set to seal a £1.5million deal for Southampton defender Andrew Davies...Ipswich boss Jim Magilton has had an offer for defender Moritz Volz accepted by Fulham..Portsmouth boss Harry Redknapp is in talks with French side Lens to take Algeria left-back Nadir Belhadj in a season-long loan deal this week...Blackburn boss Paul Ince will make a new bid this week to take his old MK Dons skipper Keith Andrews to Ewood Park...Goal-shy Norwich again struggled to score, sparking rumours they could be set to sign veteran Dutch striker Jimmy-Floyd Hasselbaink...Neil Warnock will put two players up for transfer and step up his bid to sign two strikers today as he attempts to kick-start Crystal Palace's season.